Archive for June 27, 2008

Immunizations and Ice Cream

“Could you PLEASE take Jacob to get his shots?  My insurance expires next week, the insurance from this job won’t begin for 90 days, and he needs his immunizations to be up to date for day care”, requested daughter over the phone.

“Of course!” 

“Could you maybe keep him for a couple of days, too?”

“Sure….what’s up?”  Wuh oh.  Mommy sounded a little stressed as Jacob and his lil’ brother whacked each other in the background and wailed for mommy to come administer justice.

“His day care called me again at work today.  When they set him down at the table to eat, he didn’t like what they were serving.  He threw up in his plate at the table, then smiled at them and said ‘You better call my mommy to take me home now!'”

“Hey, pretty clever!  You started pretending to be sick and having the school call your grandmother to come to get you when you were in first grade.  You didn’t stop until I spanked you and instructed your grandmother that she wasn’t to pick you up unless there was arterial spurting, projectile vomiting, or a bone protruding through the skin.”

“So you’re saying that’s normal behavior?”

“No, I’m saying he’s acting just like his momma.”

“I need to warn you about the shots.  He’s going to scream, cry, hit, kick, and carry on.  You’ll probably have to take daddy along to help hold him down.”  Hunh.  Well, I doubt that I would have any trouble whatsoever restraining a 4-year-old boy when I used to have to restrain grown men, but I told SwampMan he had to go invited SwampMan along anyway because of my tendonitis.

We got to the doctor’s office, and Jacob went happily into the waiting room. Happily, that is, until the nice lady in scrubs opened the door and called out “Jacob!” Apparently he had thought that the doctor visit was for me. He grabbed the arms of the chair and started crying “NO! NO! I don’t WANT to go in!” SwampMan tried to tell him it was okay, and we would get ice cream afterwards. I looked at the little fit pitcher (soooo much like his momma!) and told him “Jacob, it’s like this. You’re going to go in there whether you want to or not. If you go in there and behave, we’ll go get some ice cream afterward. If you want to go in there and scream and cry, we won’t go get ice cream afterwards.” SwampMan picked him up and carried him in without any more drama.

Jacob sat there and would NOT answer any of the questions the nurse asked. When she left, SwampMan tried to engage him in conversation and was completely ignored. Somebody was throwing a silent tantrum. Those are my favorite kind.

I picked up a book and started reading it to him. Then he asked me to read another book, then pointed out one that he wanted to look at the pictures.

The doctor came in, and we talked about how the day care center was concerned about the throwing up behavior, which only happened at daycare, but they thought that maybe he needed a swallowing study and other workup.

“He’s already figured that out? Wow! What a bright kid!” the doc said. “I have found with my own kids that making them clean up the mess is pretty good motivation for not doing it anymore.” I agree completely.

The phone rang, and I told her that the phone call was from his mother, and she might have questions. The doc said “You mean YOU aren’t the mom?”

“No, I’m the grandmother.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me! You don’t look like a grandmother!” (Is this doctor great or what?)

She completed the physical and left the room. Hey, that wasn’t bad at all! Jacob told me he thought his little brother would like this doctor and picked up the picture book.

The lady came in with the shots. Jacob was absorbed in the picture book. She told SwampMan to hold one arm, and told him that Jacob was going to cry, because there were five separate individual shots, three in one arm, and two in the other. FIVE? SwampMan and I looked at each other. SwampMan said “I didn’t get that many shots before I went to school!” Wow. I didn’t get that many shots until I went into the Army! Being four years old is TOUGH.

SwampMan held one arm and told Jacob “Don’t look at the shots!” By that time, the woman had already given him two in the other arm. She was GOOD. I held the book in front of him, and was turning the pages so he had something to look at, although I believe he was focusing on my face.

The nurse put brightly colored Band-Aids on his wounded arm, told us “I can’t believe it! He didn’t even flinch!” and moved to the other arm. Again, not so much as a flinch. Not the first tear. After she put on the Band-Aids, she asked if he wanted suckers. “Of course! He ALWAYS wants suckers”, I answered for him. When he got the suckers (Woohoo! THREE! The good, thick kind with the loop stick), he asked “I was good? We can go get ice cream now?”

Mommy called afterwards while Jacob was enjoying his ice cream, and Jacob held the phone away so she could “see” those brightly-colored Band-Aids. “You have GOT to be kidding me. He didn’t even FLINCH? He didn’t scream and cry? If I would have been there, he would have been kicking, screaming, and I would have been trying to hold him while Dylan was sticking medical instruments into the power outlets. How did you manage THAT?”

I refrained from telling her that I didn’t offer too much sympathy (which is located between you-know-what and syphillis in the dictionary). Instead, I casually mentioned that ice cream may have been involved.

“Oh, ice cream, huh? Well, THAT explains it.”

So, that’s how Jacob came to have ice cream, suckers, and chocolate milk for lunch today (oddly enough, he had no trouble eating this stuff that is almost guaranteed to upset a delicate stomach), and we also stopped at the toy store and got play dough, a toy sword, those stretchy, sticky toy lizards which are undoubtedly made from hazardous waste from China that are now stuck to the ovens, microwave, and probably the bottom of my shoes, and a Spiderman ball.

If mommy should happen to ask, he had fish and broccoli for lunch. Maybe Brussels sprouts, too.

We have to run. A game of hide and seek is overdue.

Comments (4) »

Cumberland Island Fire Now 1,000 Acres

CAMDEN COUNTY, GA — A fire on Cumberland Island is now up to 1,000 acres as of Friday morning.

The fire began Wednesday, most likely due to a lightning strike.

It’s been named the South Cut Fire.

The fire, burning on the north end of the island, isn’t threatening homes or other structures at this time.

The fire is located on federally protected land, which means it’s being fought by state fire officials.

The Camden County Fire Department, though, says it has received some calls from residents near Woodbine and Harriet’s Bluff that heavy smoke from the fire was lowering visibility.

First Coast News spoke with some of them.

When Justin Day got to work Thursday morning, the smoke was one of the first things he and his landscaping crew noticed.

“We started out in Woodbine, my boss here noticed some strong smell and he noticed smoke in the air. It smelled like something electrical was burning,” said Day.

Newell Hamilton says he noticed the smoke Wednesday night.

“You could smell the smoke, you could see it, you had very low visibility over the water, it looked like,” said Hamilton.

At this time, forestry says most of the fire is not contained. Firefighters say they don’t believe it will be a problem for the wildlife there.

Source:  First Coast News

Hunh.  Must be what I saw drifting along the coast.  Didn’t know where it came from.

Comments (1) »

I Knew the Dissenting Justices Hadn’t Read the Constitution–I Didn’t Know They Didn’t Read Law Cases Cited

This is terrible!  How intellectually inferior do you have to be to become a liberal justice? (Don’t answer that.)

From Of Arms and the Law, I learn that:

Comment on to previous post points out at p.2 of the Stevens dissent he refers to NFA and US v. Miller: “Upholding a conviction under that Act, this Court held that…”

Same mistake the 9th Circus made years ago and had to issue a new opinion, since Miller was never convicted — commentators noted this was pretty suggestive the court hadn’t bothered to read Miller before citing it. First thing you look for in reading a case is what happened below, and what the Court do to that. Very first thing.

I’d add that at 41 he refers to:

“In 1901 the President revitalized the militia by creating the ‘National Guard of the several States,’ Perpich 496 U.S. at 341 and nn. 9-10.”

Reading that part of Perpich v. Dodd: It says in 1901 President Roosevelt called for reforming the militia. He didn’t create the National Guard (where would he have had the authority?)

On the next page Perpich says that Congress in 1903 enacted the Dick Act, which created the “National Guard of the Several States.” Footnote 11 of that opinion, referring to creation of the Guard, begins: “The Act of January 21, 1903, 32 Stat. 775, provided in part…” So I guess he didn’t read the Perpich case, either, let alone verify the dates and who did what.

And none of the four signing onto this opinion, and none of their clerks, saw these items?

I knew that the justices dissenting hadn’t read or understood the constitution and were factually wrong based on that.  I did not know that the cases they cited were also wrong, but I suppose I should not be surprised.  I am, however, disgusted.


Leave a comment »