Archive for February, 2011

Dang! That Got My Attention.

I looked down at my pocket as I was tucking away something the boy had thrown into the flowers when I informed him that we can’t take it into the cafeteria. We don’t allow our kids to carry toys of any kind (that can be thrown) and especially not long cords (in this case a shoelace) that can be used to strangle other students, teachers, or other innocent passers by that do not know to be wary of some of our children if they are not in a sunny mood. Then I repeated the instruction that we walk on the sidewalk, not in the grass. (Silly school rules, right?)

I broke an unwritten rule (mine!) about this boy–never, NEVER look away! He hit me hard enough to drive my glasses into the bridge of my nose, creating a cut that started bleeding pretty freely. I reeled backwards off balance, almost going down. I was taken completely by surprise. He immediately jumped at me, kicking, hitting (several more face hits) and attempting to bite simultaneously. I kept pushing him back. Frustrated at not tearing chunks outta me, he yanked his shoe off and whacked me across the nose again while I was fending off the teeth. *sigh* I’m gettin’ too slow at this! Shoes were taken away and tossed aside, and he was marched back to the classroom.

I don’t think I got injured in the military breaking up bar brawls with the kind of regularity that I do in the classroom. Self defense, I find, is a little more tricky when I absolutely cannot do any kind of damage to a child that would happily chew through my carotid or femoral artery and who was, in fact, making very spirited attempts to do so, along with a mastectomy by teeth. In the military I was issued a sidearm and a club and had carte blanche to use them on attackers. The military was better.

A lot of people were concerned about my injury (which looked worse than it was due to facial vascularity) but I had to tell them, like I told you, that it was my fault for not being sufficiently alert. I took my eyes off and I know better. Luckily this time none of the other children were injured, and I just have a *very* sore nose and the possibility of two black eyes tomorrow that will remind me to stay hyperalert.

I never did find the shoelace that I was pocketing when he whacked me. He probably retrieved it when I was reeling backwards off balance and will use it on me tomorrow.

Three and a half months until school break!

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Obama’s Foreign Policy

Obama’s foreign policy looks a lot like his domestic policy (except substitute forcible rape for the lovemaking part if you actually work for a living and/or run your own company).

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Stick a Fork in the Economy, Folks…

It’s done. I hope we can afford to give it a decent burial.

After a period of mourning, we need to go after the bastards in government that have put us in this position.

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Missing in Action…..

A lot of shit has been hitting the fan this past week, and I’ve been uncharacteristically silent about it, I know. KC E-mailed me to find out what the problem was. If it wouldn’t have been for SwampMan E-mailing me a list of my overdue books about the same time, I wouldn’t have even seen it!

Lambing is always the busiest time of the year for me. The place descends into even more chaos than usual as everyday maintenance (like vacuuming and washing dishes) get shoved to the bottom of the list of Things That Must Be Done while things like checking the ewes and lambs frequently goes to the top of the list. I’ve got predators decimating the ducks at night, and I need to jump up and run outside with a flashlight and a shotgun every time the dog barks in case something is after the lambs. I suppose that’s my night job. Then (grin) there’s the day job, the (very) quiet search for another day job, there’s the weekend doting grandmother and momma job, etc. etc. etc., which isn’t leaving a lot of time for blogging.

Having a new grandbaby born in the midst of the chaos put me even further behind, if that is humanly possible! How far behind? Well, SwampMan and I went out to dinner to celebrate my birthday last night, exactly two weeks after my birthday! (Well, he SAID it was for my birthday, but I *think* the real reason is that after I got the livestock fed, I would probably collapse and feed SwampMan leftovers. Plus he was tired and wanted to go to sleep at a relatively normal time.) I haven’t been to mom’s house in a month. Just need to move faster, I guess.

In a few weeks, things will be back to normal, and I’ll be my usual opinionated self again.

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Good Morning! Time to Feed the Livestock and Hit the Road to Daughter’s House

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Where’s Zoe’s Weenie?

Mommy was bathing Zoe while Dylan watched, fascinated, as I was cooking.

“What’s wrong with Zoe’s weenie?”

“That’s not a weenie. That’s her belly button!”

“Well…where is her weenie?”

“She doesn’t have a weenie. She’s a girl. Girls don’t have weenies.”

“Mommy, EVERYBODY has a weenie!”

“Okay, then where is it?” Mommy challenged.

“Is it inside her?” asked Dylan.

Mommy knew when to admit defeat. “Yes.”

“Is your weenie on the inside, Mommy?”

I was snickering in the kitchen, glad that I didn’t have to answer any of those questions. I wasn’t going to be completely left out of the conversation, though, however much I may have wanted to be.

“Meemaw! Do you know where Zoe’s weenie is?”

I could not help myself, particularly when it sounded like the weenie was wandering off getting into the cookie jar, so I replied. “No, precious, where is it?”

“It’s inside her butt!”

Oh, if only I would have had a camera ready to take a picture of Mommy’s face when he said that!

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Here’s a Question I’ve Been Asking Myself….

An article in the Rolling Stones asks Why Isn’t Wall Street in Jail? This is a question I’ve asked myself. If a nonpolitically-connected person had done such egregious crimes, they’d be looking at a life sentence. People that tried to do their jobs and investigate actual crimes were fired. I think that we’re going to have to get rid of the whole stinking mess in Washington before this gets better.

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