Mom had a biopsy with wide margins done @ two weeks ago. The diagnosis was Merkel cell carcinoma. She was supposed to have a PET scan and surgery done the next week, but she picked up a virus.
She had a PET scan done the day before Thanksgiving. She told me everything was fine, but her oncologist called her today and wanted her to come in at once to discuss the results of the PET scan. She’ll go tomorrow, but called me and told me that she’s going to cancel her surgery because the urgency means that the cancer has spread, and she doesn’t want to go through surgery if it isn’t going to do any good. She’s also refusing to do radiation therapy which is very effective for MCC.
I hung up the phone this afternoon in exasperation with a strong desire to screech and pull my hair out. WHY is she being so difficult? Then, of course, I realized that she is afraid. She received a possible death sentence and doesn’t want disfigurement on top of that (the radical surgery to her face). She is sad and depressed and lonely.
My poor lil’ brother, who came to Georgia for the winter at my behest when I told him that Mom was thinking about selling off everything and moving north to be closer to her boys, doesn’t know what to do. He trims shrubberies, paints the house, and does miscellaneous handyman chores. Trying to talk somebody out of dying who seems desirous of doing so is difficult.
I’ll go up tomorrow and talk with her oncologist about the PET scan and try to keep her from cancelling her surgery tomorrow. Wish me luck. If you know anything about MCC, please feel free to post a link or anecdote.
I’m likely to be a trifle distracted running back and forth between Florida and Georgia, so I’m not sure how regularly I’ll post for the next few days.